Throwin’ Punches in the Dark

Some days I feel like I am accomplishing nothing.  Sometimes I feel like everything I do amounts to nothing.  Sometimes I feel like, if I didn’t even exist it wouldn’t matter.  Sometimes I don’t even know why I try.  Sometimes I try and wonder why I even am.

There are alot of times when it just doesn’t seem like life is really worth it.  It seems like we’re constantly fighting this uphill battle on a hill that we’ll never reach the top and eventually just trip and fall all the way down.  People always say that they never said life was going to be easy, but they never told me it was going to be this hard.

I’ve felt this inadequate feeling multiple times in my life.  It’s something that I can believe that everyone feels at some moment in time.  We feel so insignificant.  We scratch and fight and pull ourselves forward just to find another obstacle.  It seems like this perpetual cycle will never end.

I’m reminded of a song.  It is by Matthew Perryman Jones.  He’s a not so well known musician out of Nashville.   He has a song called Refuge.  The first part of the second verse reads like this…

LORD I Get so Tired of Fighting,

Throwin’ Punches in the Dark,

Where Mystery’s Seduction Puts a Blindfold on my Heart,

Oh This Seem Too Much…

This has stuck with me.  So many times I feel like I am doing just that… Throwing punches in the dark.

But this song is called refuge.  What is he talking about?   Here’s the entire lyrics…

Lord, i feel the weight of a mountain
Pressing down inside my soul
I can see the pillars fallin’
There ain’t nothin’ left to hold

The reigns are broken too
I can’t steer this
There’s nothing i can do
Except to throw my arms out

Take me to
A place where love can mend these wounds
Where mystery can dance with truth
And the broken soul finds refuge

I get so tired of fighting
Throwing punches in the dark
When mystery’s seduction
Keeps a blindfold on my heart

Oh, it seems too much
God i fear this
I’m longing for your touch
And for your kisses

Take me to
A place where love can mend these wounds
Where mystery can dance with truth
And the broken soul finds refuge

Can you calm this angry tide
The fears and rage inside
Won’t you lead me to the place where beauty dwells

You go dancing on the hills
And i won’t rest until
You take me to the place where beauty dwells

Take me to
A place where love can mend these wounds
Where mystery can dance with truth
The broken soul finds refuge

Take me to
A place where love can mend these wounds
Where mystery can dance with truth
And the broken soul finds refuge

It’s a beautiful song, and it’s message is just as amazing.

In those times when you can’t make it any further, and you feel like the world is draggin you down.  In those times when you’re fighting with nothing and accomplishing nothing… rest within the LORD.  Let him be your refuge.

He will bandage your wounds.  He will prepare a place for your broken soul.  Just let him take over.

I absolutely love this song, and I forgot how much it really means till I re listened to this song about a week ago.  So even when the world is dragging you down and your chains are too heavy… look to your refuge. Look to a place where Love will mend your wounds and you will dance within the mystery of truth.

Here’s the song…